• simply post a photo of something that makes you wildly happy.

this is what it looks like when we lock up for the night. i'm a big fan of being done at the end of the day and knowing everyone's home and safe.

i have nothing worthy of an entire post to write about, but i've still got words i am desperate want to use. so i'm stealing holly's potluck monday idea. and i might steal it every monday. that's for me to know and you to find out. (ok, really i've got no idea.) what's a posting potluck? well, you know how when you go to a potluck dinner and everyone brings a dish that is for the most part absolutely unrelated to any other dish there, but it still tastes good? it's sort of like that. but with random thoughts instead of food. and i'm the only one who contributes.



i sure am. today the temp hit 41, which to my farenheit temperature telling brain sounds lovely. but they use celsius here and that that translates to 107 farenheit. and we have to sleep without aircon. which means i don't sleep. i just sweat. and that is not at all refreshing.







this week dr. google thinks i might be menopausal or possible going through nicotine withdrawal. i'm betting he's wrong on both accounts.







mangosteen, apples, rambuton, onions and a tide to go pen. the tide to go pen is the most valuable.







carnitas, spaghetti or boiled eggs. i also didn't burn a souffle. of course, i didn't make a souffle.




and that's all the random i have to offer.

oh, and this is a bloghop. i'm not exactly sure what that means or how it works, but i'm doing it. and you can, too.

the man has just returned from indonesia. he was gone four days - which is a short time in comparison to his normal trips. but, when you figure in his next most recent trip was 3 weeks long and had him returning late last saturday night (giving him a little over 2 days at home) it didn't feel so short. i have people ask me all the time "how do you do it?" how do we manage the comings and goings. and my answer is we just do. i don't mean to sound flippant, but it's one of those things that we do because we have to. we knew that the traveling and the seperation came with this job - with this opportunity to live in thailand. but knowing it and adjusting to it are two very different things. and sometimes it is hard.

when he's not here the whole family dynamic changes. basically, we function as a single parent family. but single parenting when you're not really a single parent can be difficult. it's not so great for the kids to have only me at home. i am not the fun parent. i am the one that is most likely to say, "no." when i'm reacting to something, i try hard to think about how he would react and balance my over the top with his a bit more laid back nature. i frequently don't succeed.

but apart from the parenting thing there's the whole he's my spouse thing. you know, the "we're in this together" thing. except, often we're not. at least not geographically. and i find myself becoming resentful. the bills, the kids, meal planning, household or car repairs (planned and surprise) and any other day to day thing (like bicycle-vs.-motorcy-not-really-an-accident accidents) all fall to me when he's gone. and i handle it all. not always well, but it usually gets taken care of. the odd thing is that the things that bother me most are the things i would be responsible for if he were home. i read an article the other day and this quote was in it (you can click on the quote for the full article).

The difficulty of living out the married life at a distance is that the independence you need to develop in order to function well apart, directly challenges the healthy interdependence that defines a good marriage when you are together.

we've now been in thailand coming up on 2 and 1/2 years. and i'm finally ready to invest in something. i've spent the last 18 months being the christian ed. chair at our church. which means i've taken care of children's ministry. in a very mediocre way. it was something i got into spur of the moment like. with no thought given. and seeing as it's an 18 month commitment and i very clearly said "no" when asked if i'd be interested in another term - i'm wrapping that one up and not looking back. so, now it's time for something new. i would love for the next thing to be something i really want to do - you know be a little more intentional about it and less spur of the moment.

i want to be more involved at the kids' school. in the states i was extremely involved and i miss that terribly. i've taken care of this one. i'm going to be the ptg secretary next year. this involved an election - i was unapposed, but still people had to raise their hands and all.

another thing i know i want to do is become more familiar with the local compassion office. i've sent a tentative email to see if there are things i can do there. if we were in the states i would offer to do administrative type things - but here there's the whole language thing. i know they would like me to teach english, but i've given that a try on two occasions and i'm really, really bad at it. i really hope this one works out.

and there is one other thing i'd like to do. there are several orphanages in the area. i'd like to get involved with one. i'd like for the kids to be able to be involved, too. at least #1 and #2. not that i wouldn't like for #3 to be involved, but it's likely that he's too young. so i've put some feelers out on that one, too.

and as i think about this, i'm a little worried. i know three separate things at one time seems alot, in my head i have it all working out. no problems. but it involves setting boundaries. that might be a problem. i'm not good with boundaries. (that's how come we have three dogs.) i have just emailed the ptg president to see exactly what kind of commitment i'm looking at. i don't really think it's too scary, a few meetings and such. in my tentative email to compassion i almost mentioned that i was available 1 morning a week. wishing i had done that. and i've told the orphanage 2 days a week. we're gonna have to work out times and days and such. and seeing as they do have a schedule that the kids are on it might not be too hard to keep it to two days. so, see, it all works out perfectly.

the rules:

• simply post a photo of something that makes you wildly happy.

these are the koi in our pond. they are happy to eat the same meal three times a day. everyday. not one complaint.

the motorcy incident is behind us and i'm pretty certain that #1 was not at fault - but this cultural transaction still cost us 4ooo฿ ($124.00). we might have been able to put up a fight and pay less. we could have argued that the guy was putting on an act and his injuries were not as bad as he was making them out to be. we could have pointed out that what he said was the estimate for repairs to his motorcy seemed to be double what it should have been. and since we were reimbursing him for time missed from work we could have said we'd only pay for the 2 days the doctor excused and not the five days he was certain he needed. and we would have been right. but in order to do that we would have been saying we didn't believe him. that we thought he was lying. which would have caused him to lose face. and in so many dealings with thai the right outcome is the outcome that helps save face. or at least causes the least loss of face.

part of me thinks that his guy wasn't so worried with saving face. that the saving face thing was convenient because he knew it would be difficult for us to put up too much of an argument. and i don't like that. i don't like feeling like i've gotten the short end of the stick.

but there's more to it than just money and the hurt feelings. the big picture includes the entire neighborhood. the guy works just around the corner from us. the entire neighborhood knew what had happened and who was invovled within seconds of the incident. and the entire neighborhood was watching to see how it would turn out. everyone had an opinion of how it happened and who was at fault. and i think when it comes down to a he said/he said involving a thai security guard and a farang teen it's not too difficult to reach a conclusion that does not favor #1. so, to keep the peace we paid. and then explained to #1 that we did believe him even though our actions made it appear that we didn't.

i don't know if we did he right thing. there probably was a better way to handle it, but we did the best we could and now we have another story to add to our time in thailand tale.